Oops...

There are a lot of thinks I learned growing up that I no longer agree with. "Cutting out carbs and eating nothing but steak is NOT the best diet plan. Being religious and talking to God only when you need something probably won't win you the most points with the man upstairs in the long run. But, of all things I learned as a child, there is one thing that I shall always hold near and dear to my heart:

Fuck Canada.

I mentioned offhand that yesterday that I wanted to go to dinner. I have fallen into a bit of a bad habit. 5 night a week, I cook dinner for Oleg and I. As he is far too skinny, I do my best to make the food nice and fattening, in hopes of chubbing him up a little bit. Which in turn chubs me up. And then, the other 2-3 nights a week, I don't have any desire to cook for myself (who likes to cook for one?) and I end up eating 40p pizza from my university or going out for fast food. I meant I wanted to go to My-My, because... fuck yeah, My-My. But Chris mentioned Chili's, and thus Thursday night has become Chili's night. All but one of the Americans came... Even Julia/Angelina.

Back up: The night before, Chris made fajitas. I was supposed to come over, but he cursed me out for texting him instead of talking on the phone (because I was on the street and I couldn;t hear him over the cars) so Grisha and I went to the mall. I discovered Kroshka Kartoshka makes strawberry blinchiki for 45p, and MacDonalds sells Pizza Pockets for like 50p they call "pereshok po-intaliansky." So, I was willing to do Chili's, as I hadn't had Mexican the night before.

Also, I wore my new red shirt out. I had promised Oleg when I bought it that I wouldn't wear it out without him, as his first response to it was, "But you already HAVE a boyfriend!" But then I heard Angelina was coming and she is a model-quality blonde Russian girl, and I needed some sort of defense. So, I looked pretty cute. The menu at Chili's is the same as in the US, it isn't too pricey, and they have great drinks.

I understand restaurants here are expensive when you are making your money in Russia (where salaries are low) but they aren't too bad by American standards... Once you figure that you don't add 8% tax, and mandatory 20% tip (yes, I never tip under 20% in the US) its probably about the same.

After dinner, I left to meet my friend Jaidy at Lubyanka. She got accepted to Queen's College in London for an exciting program in international conflict resolution. She's thinking of studying Chechnya, except then she'd have to go there to interview people, and that could end poorly...

She was late (as always) but she finally showed up with two of her co-workers, a Russian girl whose name I didn't catch, and a fucking Canadian.

We went to a bar called Prirogi, or something similar. It is apparently a chain. Cheap and cozy. I really liked it. Us girls met up with some of the boys, but otherwise, we were the only girls there... some Russian men heard us speaking English and catcalled us. Vanessa, who is Austrian, had a bad day at work, so I bought her a Sex on the Beach. 140p. Could have stayed all night.

We eventually left for Propaganda (a block away) and lost Katya and the other Russian girl in the process. It was... Propaganda. Same old same old. Sort of awkward music, but its free. Tried playing wingwoman for Jaidy, who was having boyfriend problems as always. We had overpaid our bill at the last bar by 350p, and used that money to buy a round of cheap vodka shots. We stayed for about an hour and chose to leave.

Unfortunately, we followed Dima to some bar that was fucking DEAD. The other two boys (we had misplaced the rest of them) went to the bar to chat up some girls, so Dima, Vanessa, Jaidy, Sara (the Canadian) and I sat at a table. They all drank, but I took a break, and wanted to leave as much as possible. I somehow ended up boxed in by crazy Canadian. She was loud, and obnoxious, and wouldn't shut the fuck up.

The reason me and most normal Americans hate Canadians is that they take all the good things about American culture, and then add some more good things (like legalized marijuana) and then have a crazy superiority complex about it. Dude... you are piggybacking off us. That is the only reason you have time to have any culture... there's nothing else for you to fucking DO in Canada. This particular Canada was worst than most, because she has lived all over the world, so, instead of explaining to me why Canada is better than everywhere she has ever lived, she explained why it is better than every other country on the planet. Every. other. country. One. by. one. And as she got drunk, she got loud. Granted, I understand she was older than us (32) and at a different point in her life (married with 2 kids), but all she did (aside from talking about Christ and how her whole family were Messianic Jews and how everything sucks compared to Fucking Canada) was talk about how uncomfortable she felt at clubs, because she was too old and hadn't done it for forever. THEN GO HOME! Everyone left me alone at the table nodding to her ("My husband wants to retire to Israel and I don't understand it because he hated living there and after living in the Middle East for so long I don't sympathize with Israel at all...") and considering pretending to text people on my phone so she would shut up.

We left from there and took a cab to Solyanka. It was really unpleasant to have Jaidy on our laps, as she is so skinny, and therefor pretty bony.

We did our best to speak English outside of Solyanka. I learned my lesson, and told the bouncer I was 22. No cover. Solyanka is an awesome club... there are three rooms, connected by a hallway that looks like the hallway of a large home. The first room was like rap music for dancing, the second was armchairs for chilling, and the third was sort of house music. I'm pretty sure half the people there were on X, and there were groups of people just hugging and moshing. I didn't get a drink, as it was crazy expensive. Also, I was a little worried, as there was a very overweight woman all in black (think biker chick with Gothic makeup) with a creepy-looking dude in the corner just WATCHING, and I was mildly worried they were looking for signs of drunkenness to identify whose organs could most easily be stolen.

I would dance a little bit, but my boots were starting to hurt. We began to unofficially play a game. I was talking to Dave (he was asking me why I had a Russian boyfriend when they tend not to go out and party... and does he even buy me flowers? I managed to quiet him with, "He's a lawyer, yes, he has his own flat, and a car," at which point he stopped questioning and started congratulating me. And then Sara came up and started asking him where he was from. I seized my chance and ran away and found everyone else. A few minutes later, they followed me. Then she would talk to Victor, and the rest of us ran away. It became a game of "Pawn off the crazy Canadian who talks too much, too loudly on someone else."

At about 330, we left. I would usually be disappointed we went home so early, but my feet were really hurting, and I didn't have my usual Red Devil to keep me awake. I took a cab home with Dima and Dave, as Jaidy was trying to find Sarah a cab ride home, and we couldn't fit all six of us in a cab. I guess they were going to continue the party in the dorms (Jaidy has an expired proposk, and they always let her in! SO jealous!) but I was too tired, and just went to bed.

I love Moscow so much. I asked Jaidy for the business card of her job, and I think I'm going to go talk to them next week. At her place, I'd need a TEFL, but I can get it online. I know other places were I can work without it, but I figure it'll make me more marketable. I'll work on it over the summer. Aside from her official job, she teaches English on the side... she met a businessman at a bar, and he asked her to teach him English. She offered 3500p a lesson, he told her he'd pay 4000p, but he always gives her 5000p. And, he has someone taking her to the Kremlin to see... well, something next week (I don't remember). And she makes 3800p to sit with a small child for 2 hours and speak English to it. So, I'm going to start applying/making calls in the next few weeks. Or, maybe I'll do it in May after my finals.

But my new fear is that I am going to become fat and mean and washed-up like the Canadian girl.